[NOTE: all posts this month end with an ethical cum tribute.]
Sup y’all! Okay, so, today we’re talking about penises. But not all penises, mainly just the penises that nobody fucking asked to see…. you know?
The penises that show up in your goddamn [insert social media platform] instant message inbox, or your email, or midday in a text while you’re in a fucking work meeting, and all you can think to yourself is: “who the fucking fuck thinks it’s okay to just randomly send me a goddamn picture or their rancid ass cock?”
Yeah, those penises.
Now, if you’re reading this and you’ve frequently been a recipient of these digitally rendered eye sores then I’m actually not sure if there’s a lot that you’ll personally get out of this post in particular, because this post is almost entirely written for the people sending those digitally rendered eye sores. But please rest assured that it’s not an affirming post, it’s a harm reduction post.
Which leads me to you, people with penises reading this right now!
Look, I get it… you’re horny, you haven’t had a lot of luck offline for a while, and maybe you’re even feeling a fuckload frustrated, a lot bitter, and a little desperate about it. That sucks.
But believe me when I say that you will NEVER find the emotional, romantic, or sexual gratification you seek by flashing your cock and balls to somebody who didn’t ask to see them. Never. It’s not going to fucking work, okay?
You know why? Because nobody wants to be treated like shit. And that’s exactly what you’re doing when you send somebody a picture of your uninspiring boner.
I mean, think about it. How would you feel if you were going about your day, grabbing a coffee, getting on public transit, sitting at your desk, and all of a sudden some fucking rando drops trou to reveal their fucking erect penis in their hand, and asks if you want to ride that d?
Hopefully you just thought to yourself: “That sounds terrible, nobody wants that!”
You’re right, nobody wants that. So don’t fucking do that digitally, or otherwise, goddamnit.
Another important thing to understand is that when your profile is public on a mainstream platform (especially places like Twitter) and your profile image or header is of your penis then you are exposing yourself to EVERY fucking person who may, for one reason or another, cross your account, including kids, teens, maybe even members of your own family.
Think about that for a second… Are you okay with that?
Again, I’m hoping that you just thought to yourself “no, I’m not okay with that.” If so, then let’s move on to look at a few ways that you can safely, consensually, and respectful express your desires and possibly assuage some urges!
If you’re one such person who hasn’t sent an unsolicited dick pick, or maybe you have yet you felt a little shit about it, then please continue reading!
Just Use a Different Public Profile Pic on Big Social Media Platforms
Here’s the thing: the problem isn’t that you’re uploading pictures of you cock to Twitter, the problem is you’re FORCING people to look at them by flashing everybody with your profile and/or cover pics. That’d be like me sprawling out naked on a couch directly outside your apartment with my throbbing girl cock in my hand, or maybe in the front entrance of your work, jerking it while I try to make small talk with you.
Oh what, you don’t like that? Well maybe others don’t like you starting a conversation with them online while they have no choice but to look at your fucking boner in your hand either.
Just put different pictures in those main areas, and then make sure to explicitly mark your feed as being “NSFW”, “18+ only”, and/or “sexually explicit”. For example, check out mine:
Boom. It’s clearly labelled, not forcing anyone to see my girl cock, lady balls, or asshole, and if folks scroll down and see those things then that’s, hopefully, because they read my bio and decided to look.
Also keep in mind that having a cute, casual selfie as your profile image is far more likely to get you even an apprehensive response from folks. Just be sure not to then completely fucking ruin it by being gross and creepy after that. Build an actual trusting and respectful rapport before springing your horniness on a stranger.
A few other social media pro-tips:
- If you ask somebody if they want to see your nudes, and they say no, do NOT just send them anyway. Be cool, deal with the rejection like an adult, and move on.
- Just like you shouldn’t randomly send somebody pictures of your genitals, don’t respond to another person’s public tweets or comments with them either. That’s like stepping into the middle of people talking at a bus stop and whipping your fucking dick out. Not cool.
- Understand that not every tweet, comment, or post is about you! If somebody is tweeting about wanting to get fucked, that’s not a personal invitation for you to bombard them with desperate, horny messages. If you want to sext, go to a sexting site.
- Generally speaking, if your sole purpose for talking to somebody over social media is to try and sext with them or get them to send you nudes, just don’t fucking message them… okay? People don’t exist on the internet for your sexual gratification and assuming that everybody wants to is incredibly toxic. There’s a time and place for everything, even online.
So what are the alternatives to harassing people for your sexual satisfaction on social media? There are LOTS, for example:
Just Post Your Penis in Other Places
Seriously, there are a FUCKTON of other place that you can ethically and consensually show your bits online for wanting audiences. Reddit is a great place to start. Here’s a bunch to check out and see if any are for you:
Just be sure to read the rules and respect other posters. These spaces are fun and explicit but there are still community standards that protect users from abuse and threats. Don’t be one of the abusers.
Anyway, you know who DOESN’T send random nudes or try to pressure me into sexting? My pal Pitch! He understands the importance of valuing the personal autonomy, and respecting the boundaries, of folks on the internet. Be like Pitch!
What the fuck does this have to do with anything? Well, all this month I’m going to be posting more content like this about engaging in sexual activity online both consensually and respectfully. And as part of that I’m also doing some ethical cum tributes! You know, for education! And for funsies.
Last post I cum tributed another peer, so this time it’s Pitch’s turn because he’s cute as fuck, has a GREAT cock, and is honestly queer style goals for me!
Want me to do a cum tribute to an image of you? Cool! They’re just $25.00 a pop and I send you at least 2 pics of the cum splatter plus a 15 to 30 second clip of me actually ejaculating onto your image. If interested please DM me on Twitter or send an email to email@example.com.
SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY OR YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!
*18+ only, image MUST be of you or an artist’s rendition of you (fursonas welcome!), it’s $25.00 per cum tribute per image you submit, cum tributes are not started until I receive FULL payment of funds (ask about payment methods). E-transfer option available for Canadians.