Mx Nillin’s Monthly Refap: July 2017

[CW: image at the end shows NSFW image of a cute enby babe cover in their own semen]

It has been so fucking hot out y’all. Like, the vast majority of the last month in Saskatchewan has actually seen near historic highs of 35-40 degrees Celsius on average and where I live we experienced literally the hottest and driest July ever on record.

Yet despite this, I actually managed to ramp up productivity during the latter half of the month!


Blog Related Stuff

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Backyard Nudes, Buying Porn From Friends, A Taste for Erotica, and Fem Beards.

  • As part of the erotica chapter I wrote this month my partner took some fun lewd pics of me in our car parked out back of the place we rent. It was hot and sweaty out, and taking those pics in the early evening while neighbors went about yard work on the other side of fences was SUPER exciting. 
  • Speaking of erotica: I’m kinda hooked now! So, not only is chapter 2 of the prairie queers story in the works, but I’m also writing a story inspired by sex talk with and fantasies about a friend. Know what the best part about it is? She knows that I’m writing it, has consented to being involved in the piece, is excited to read it, and she even picked her character’s name! 
  • Earlier in the month my partner and I bought porn from good friends of ours who sell clips on Amateur Porn. We’ve been pretty close with them for a while and watching a hardcore sex video of them was seriously hot af. Keep an eye out for a post on more feels about that later!
  • I’ve purposely been trying to shave less often lately. For two reasons, really: 1. I’m fucking cute af and I’m tired of my facial hair making me feel less attractive, and, 2. I fucking hate shaving. So, I’m kinda all about finding where I feel best with stubble going on. Test selfies incoming to Twitter over the next couple of weeks!


More Cool Stuff

Taylor J. Mace at Feisty Fox Films always publishes outstanding content but the posts they were putting out last month REALLY got me in the feels. Specifically their pieces The Blogsquad, Making Conferences More Welcoming, and having crushes on your friends were hands down some of my favorite summer reads.  

One of my all-time favorite sex comics online is Alfie from InCase and I hadn’t really read it much this year so last week I caught up on, like, two Chapters and holy shit hot damn… if you haven’t read it before then you should seriously get the fuck on that. Here’s where it all begins: Chapter 1.

All my sex blogger friends are heading off to the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit and I am feeling simultaneously fucking stoked for them, and also sad that I’m not there. Please, everyone, have the best time and take all of the pictures!

I’m kinda all about this lewd Winnie the Pooh art right now.

Also, these Nintendo babes in cat keyhole bras & bikinis.


Sexy Selfie of the Month

Throwback lewd to that time I came all over my own face and dress then took cute facial selfies.

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Why I Don’t Put a Period After the “Mx” In “Mx Nillin”

Fact: the vast majority of people I have interacted with throughout my life do not respect, or even acknowledge most of the terminology I used to describe myself, or that other non-binary or gender nonconforming people use for themselves either.

Also fact: most people will either pointedly, defensively, or aggressively, work to undermine the language that I and other queer and trans people use in an effort to reassert the language that THEY think we should use, all while expecting that I accept and respect their self-descriptors and terminology.

And that’s like…

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In my experience, people in general have a tendency to desperately cling onto “grammar”. They use it as justification for their invalidating, degrading, and dismissive behaviors toward trans and queer folx who make them feel uncomfortable, who scare them, or who they just dislike due to the generally ignorant and discriminatory belief systems they were raised under.

Those who adamantly believe in the absolutes of men and women, masculinity and femininity, or gay or straight, love to weaponize grammatical rules, dictionaries, memes, and to attack,silence, and repress anyone that dares exist outside of those parameters.

It’s fucking exhausting, to be honest.

I can’t even begin to tell you how often that people (both cishet and LGBTQ+) rant at me about my “made up, bullshit identity”, and my “made up, bullshit pronouns”, and “made up, bullshit terminology”. I can’t even begin to tell you how many self-ascribed allies insist that the way that I identify, and the way that I have transitioned, is somehow destroying the politics of the left.

Meanwhile, there are members of my own fucking community who also insist that I’m just some PC, special snowflake asshole out to ruin everything for the gays and “real trans people” by asking for such ludicrous things as basics rights and protection too, bodily autonomy, self-identification, to please not misgender me and use my pronouns, please. “It’s people like you that made Trump win the election,” I’m told by a gay man with a generic “love wins” profile pic. I know that he’s a gay man because he made very sure to preface his shitty comments with “as a gay man I feel that -”


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But fuck that. I’mma do me.

In early 2015, I took my first major step toward self-actualization and began using they/them/their pronouns (much to the distress of my family and some old friends).

If you don’t want to use those pronouns for me because [INSERT SHITTY EXCUSE HERE] that’s fine. You can lick my butthole while you’re at it.

Most recently, in early 2016, I moved to drop the misgendering honorific “Mr.” (which is still forced down my throat by most service providers, banks, and the Government of Canada), rejected the equally misgendering honorific “Mrs.” (which some tried to apply to me as they assumed I was a trans woman), and began utilizing the gender neutral “Mx.” It became a part of how I understood myself and introduced myself in general.

Eventually, “Mx. Nillin” became “Mx Nillin”. Why?

Because, fuck American honorific rules. Fuck cisnormative grammar rules in general, to be honest.

Think this is petty to post about? You know what else is petty? The countless people who insist on commenting on how I got my own name and honorific wrong because “grammar”.

No. It’s Mx Nillin, get over it.

And yes, I’m well aware that “Mx” is now acknowledged as acceptable in the Oxford English Dictionary. Well, fuck the Oxford English Dictionary too.

Your identity is valid. Your pronouns are valid. The terminology and language that you use to understand yourself and describe your experiences are valid. No fucking dictionaries or writing styles have any official say in any of that.

But don’t mind me. I’m just that angry queer.

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The Other 25 Facts About My Queer Sex Life

Red Hot Suz recently did a 50 Fun Sex Facts About Me post, which I thought was pretty cool so I decided to do one too; but I split mine in half. The first 25 facts were posted last week and for those who’ve been waiting for the rest, here is 26 through 50!

  1. I very, very rarely wear any underwear.
  2. I absolutely refuse to tuck my girl cock, especially for any social expectations. I embrace my bulge.
  3. I love wearing butt plugs during road trips.
  4. I really want to start writing hardcore queer and trans erotica on the blog.
  5. Since coming out as queer and trans I have been degraded and rejected by half of my immediate family and most of my extended family. I no longer have contact with them.
  6. Blowjob porn is my go-to for quick fapping.
  7. I am a furry. My fursona is a femme, queer deer.
  8. I kinda love waking up with morning wood.
  9. I’m primarily a dom in the bedroom, but I like to switch on occasion.
  10. My partner and I have had sex in a lot of exciting places. Some of my faves have been: an outdoor tennis court, a baseball dugout at night, and in the dark along the Saskatchewan river as a party boat drifted by.
  11. When I was a tween I was strangely turned on by Kaa from the Jungle Book.
  12. I also masturbated to Lola Bunny a lot.
  13. Okay, I still masturbate to Lola Bunny a lot.
  14. According to those who have tasted it, my cum is generally flavorless & nice to swallow.
  15. I did my first ethical cum tribute to a friend a couple months ago & fucking loved it.
  16. Since then I’ve fantasized about people doing cum/ejaculate tributes to me too. Cum on my nudes, please!
  17. After I move away from my current city, I plan to more seriously consider sex work.
  18. On numerous occasions I have fantasized about being abducted by extraterrestrials, and used as their fuck toy.
  19. I also frequently fantasize about sex with robots.
  20. I used to be obsessed with my cock size. Since coming out as queer and trans, my insecurity around my girl cock is now almost completely non-existent.
  21. My partner and I certainly do struggle with jealousy at times in our non-monogamy, but we feel compersion [experiencing pleasure from watching my partner receive pleasure] far more often.
  22. My partner and I are nude 95% of the time that we’re home. 
  23. When I was quite young I had a urethral stricture, a condition where the urethra narrows, and I had to have a non-surgical procedure done involving dilators. It was horrible. Moving on.
  24. My first exposure to porn on the internet was hardcore hentai.
  25. I’m really excited to eat ass for the first time soon.

But enough about me, what sex facts would you have on your list?

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