It has finally happened. I finally had my first of what I’m sure will be many more pandemic sex dreams.
In it I was booty called by Kate (who I’m just now realizing I haven’t written about here in 7-months!). She was feeling horny as fuck having not had any sex since before quarantine started in the Spring and I, being the major slut that I am, was happy to oblige!
I, of course, teleported directly to her front door because sex dreams do not waste any goddam time with fucking travel scenes and shit. I don’t even think I had to knock. The door just sort of slowly, dramatically opened, not making a single creak or any sound at all, and there was Kate standing in loose fitting pajama shorts and a comfy t-shirt.
I move to just ravage her right there in the doorway, but she raises a hand to stop me, which is precisely when I notice that she is wearing thick yellow plastic gloves and one of those respirator masks out of every sci-fi movie ever when the scientists approach the fucking alien object for the first time. Meanwhile, all I got on is my everyday cloth mask and nothing else.
Oh, did I not mention that I was naked other than the mask? Cause I was. Just stark naked standing in Kate’s doorway with just a cloth mask on my face.
So, there’s good ol’ naked Dream Nillin excited to get it on with Dream Kate, who’s just an orange jumpsuit away from Rene Russo in Outbreak, when she steps to the side and motions to this small table that’s magically there. She’s doing that thing with her hands that the showcase models do on Wheel of Fortune to show you this awesome car you’re getting, only Kate’s presenting me with an assortment fucking hand sanitizers, wet naps, nail clippers, and Glad air fresheners (I have no fucking idea that last one was gonna play into anything sexual tbh LOL).
And in the dream I’m all “Fuck yeah let’s fucking do it,” so next thing I know Kate is naked too and now we’re squeezing out huge globs of hand sanitizer into our hands and fucking rubbing each other’s bodies and shit. Like, my mind is creating this whole scenario where I’m literally lathering up Kate’s tits with that stuff to the sweet tunes of Careless Whisperer.
Mm! Soooo hot! Who doesn’t love that dried out skin feel immediate after applying an entire bottle of hand sanitizer to every inch of their body during sex!?
I know I do!
Yet despite all of our sexy time PPE precautions, after cumming in Kate I take my mask off to eat my mess from out of her pussy and then help her orgasm with my tongue. But after that I put my mask right back on, like a responsible goddamn adult, and she made me use hand sanitizer yet again so boom! We were good!
Thanks, horny pandemic brain LOL
What pandemic sex dreams, if any, have y’all had?
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