Hey friends! I’m sure it’s safe to say that like me, a lot of y’all probably aren’t feeling your absolute best right now. I’m right there with you and hope you’re doing the best you can during these time.
And for those of you like me who also struggle with depression and anxiety as is… fucking hell, right??
While I wouldn’t say that I’ve slipped into severe depression just yet I’m definitely feeling this, like, creeping, gradual, consistent gloominess and morose as my partners and I all struggle with the effects of “social distancing” and the impending worry that we may have to keep space from one another for some period of time.
It doesn’t help that my satellite partner Rowan is undergoing testing with a fever and cough; and Kate’s also having to self-isolate pretty heavy while monitoring some symptoms for the next 14-days too.
That shit is scary, worsened of course by the province of Saskatchewan declaring a state of emergency with my home city shutting down to the extent that it is a literal ghost town out there and my social media overflowing with depressing as fuck, pessimistic fear mongering.
It’s all really kind of fucking me up.
Lucky for me, I have some pretty amazing partners who have really shone through during this time. Between the daily support and affection from Fal, my Tuesday date nights and the odd visit from Raven, and soul soothing weekly cuddle seasons with Verne, as well as some pretty mind blowing sex, I’m doing a hell of a lot better than I would be otherwise.
Spending time with Fal, Raven, and Verne is genuinely what’s getting me through all of this right now. Their company, affection, communication, and the OUTSTANDING sexy times, are what gives me life right now in this pandemic.
And look I can hear you saying it now: that’s NOT social isolation, Nillin! And sure, maybe your right, maybe it’s not as extensive as others are doing, but it’s where I’m at right now. It’s what I need for my mental health and wellness and it’s in accordance with current provincial containment protocols.
None of my partners are exhibiting any symptoms, we’re all monitoring ourselves and each other, thoroughly washing our hands, avoiding crowded spaces, and not leaving our apartments except to see one another or get essentials like food.
Additionally, all of us are low risk for contracting it given that most of us are not working at the moment or are employed in office spaces where most of the staff is currently working from home. Plus nobody is using public transit or going to any social events, movies, restaurants, bars, gyms, or clubs (they’re all closed by government order right now anyway).
I know that it is entirely likely the time will come when I won’t be able to see Raven or Verne for a while, and we’ll obviously adjust ourselves and our behaviors further as needed.
But until then, I’m getting all the hugs, kisses, cuddles, and fucking in that I can with my partners and we’ll take tomorrow as it comes.
Just want to take a moment here to celebrate a new blogging milestone: 1 Million Views!!! Thank you so much for reading and supporting the site over all of these years!
“Feeling this, like, creeping, gradual, consistent gloominess and morose ” this is the perfect way to put it. I’m glad you got to have that much-needed physical and emotional contact and hope that when you have to adjust to none at all, it won’t last too long. Mental health is tricky enough as it is
Ugh, I can so relate to all of this really making my mental illness so much worse. I mean, I am used to always have a feeling of impending doom and often being low and in depression, but right now, every now and then, I am going through intense panic and together with helplessness, I am just a mess. On the other hand, I also see a lot of people who for the first experience anxiety on a larger level in their lives, and seeing how they all don’t have the coping strategies that I have learnt throughout the years. I wish I could help them all 🙁
I am lucky that I am living together with my partner, so we isolate together. And here in Vancouver, it is safer to not go out at all, really, too many cases. I have been in LDRs and I can’t imagine how hard it can be to not even know when you’d be able to meet your loved ones again. Gosh, we are all so lucky that this is 2020 and we can all at least communicate via the internet!
Stay safe, sexy person <3
I’m so sorry to hear about the intensified panic and helplessness, that’s really rough and I definitely relate. That’s a really good point too about how this event has forced a lot of folks to experience levels of anxiety they have never faced before, and as such definitely don’t have the coping abilities, grounding skills, and general knowledge of stress and depression management as those of us with consistent mental health struggles do.
Glad that you are able to isolate with your partner and both look after each other! And you’re right, thank God for the internet!
Stay safe and take care xoxo
I’m privileged that I live with my partner, I can’t tell you how grateful I am for that but that’s not to say I don’t miss everyone too. We all have to do what we need to get through this and balancing our physical well-being with our mental well being is tough as hell!
Yeah I’m very fortunate to live with Fal but Raven and Verne live on their own. Agreed that we are all doing our best coping and balancing!
Ps… I forgot to say, you look as sultry as fuck in that picture!
Mollyx
1 million views is awesome. Here is to many many more views of your fabulous blog
As for your thought
“But until then, I’m getting all the hugs, kisses, cuddles, and fucking in that I can with my partners and we’ll take tomorrow as it comes.”
DO IT.
I wish I had taken the chance when I had it and I regret not doing so. I think you have to assess your risk and you seem to have done that well. I hope this nightmare is over soon and we can all get back to being able to see the people we love again soon.
Take care my friend
Molly
Thank you so much, Molly! It’s a surreal number to see but I’m very excited to keep writing for such an incredible, growing readership ❤
I’m so sorry that you missed your window for more intimacy prior to self-isolating and quarantining. I hope that this time does not last very long, and that you’re able to reunite with the people that you love again soon.
But yeah I’m still enjoying my time and risk assessing as I go! Having a wonderful night with Raven as I write this, in fact! Spending time with them had been a tremendous boost to my mental health even today as I’ve struggled with some hardcore dysthymia and melancholy.
But it won’t always be like this. Stay safe and take care, Molly! Thinking of you and yours ❤😊